Tales of an Unexpected Expatriate: July 2008

I've never really been self conscience of the way I look, well not since I've been an adult anyway. I can usually pass by people without getting much of a second glance. I might get the occasional cat call from some slimy guy in a Trans-Am. And yeah, I'm slightly tall but not freaky tall. And the odd pimple will make me hide my face in shame. But basically I'm just your average brunette blessed with legs for days, petite feet and natural red high lights :)

So it's been a new experience for me being scrutinized by strangers in the street. They look at my belly as if to say "So what's the deal here? Are you, like, fat but only in the stomach area? Or are you pregnant? Cause you look like an orange between two toothpicks"

I always figured there must be an awkward middle stage of pregnancy where you're showing but only a little and you just look really bloated. Well, I was right. So my answer to this problem is to walk like what I think pregnant women walk like. I stick my belly out as far as it will go. I waddle a little and swing my arms. I hold my back and look put out. I think it's working.

I've been buying a few things here and there for the baby. It's hard trying to buy for both a girl and a boy. I've ended up with lots of white and yellow items. Here's what I've got so far:

My friend Erin was kind enough to give me her old maternity pants. I don't think I'm quite ready for them yet.

"I lost 46 pounds in three days!"

Here's your latest belly shot. Let's all compare it to last weeks, shall we?

Yeah, no doubt, it's bigger. But I did eat half a carton of ice cream last night. And not to be cliche either. I really and truly wanted ice cream. And Paul had to go to the store specifically to get it. Oh gawd...I'm in a sitcom.

Side Note to all my yummy mummies out there: I am having the most vivid dreams lately. And many in one night. Is this a common side effect to being pregnant?

I got two really terrific books in the mail this week. The first one is from my oldest friend in the whole wide world. It's awesome so far!

I'm scared. Very scared.

The second is a baby book from Ebay. It was only 7 pounds, which is about $3.50. What a bargain. And it's got bears in it (yes Rene, it's neither boy nor girl but bear)

This is definitely a book from Britain!
-"What's a Prime Minister, mommy?"
-"I have no freaking idea, sweetheart"

But really I bought it for the illustrations and the pockets it has for keepsakes. They are really cute and include little insects. I'm a sucker for anything with a dragonfly!

But not everything we buy these days is for baby. Just yesterday Paul bought himself a new shirt! Unfortunately it was this one.

And anyone who knows him can see that he's wearing it in an ironical way. But everyone else thinks he's an idiot.

In other news...We planted some old potatoes in a chest of drawers we found in the street. And we harvested the first one last week! I was so excited that they actually grew. Here's the first and only potato to come out so far:

Paul took this blurry photo. Let's just say that empty bottle of Becks was not alone.

We went to Liverpool again for a few shows (Jules Holland & The Australian Pink Floyd). Paul's work put us up at a really shwanky hotel, in a great suite. We took some photos but they don't really show you how cool the room was (kitchenette, big bathroom, recliner couch). But there are loads of orbs in the photos! I counted 15 in one of the shots. Ya gotta click on the pic and make it big to really see them all. Weird....

Keep feeling fascination!

Love, Sher

I'm so sorry for the less than brief hiatus! Please forgive me. I hope I haven't lost you all for good! But I return with lots of news, photos and happiness! For those of you who haven't heard yet, I'm pregnant! And I couldn't be more excited! I'm 12 weeks and three days today!

Now I'm fully aware that turning this into an "Everything Baby Blog" won't be all that exciting for some of you. And filling posts with stories of sore boobs, a growing belly and hospital visits isn't going to contribute much to the greater online community as a whole. But TOO BAD!!! Cause this blog is about to get babyfied and that's not even a word! I will still tell you all about our cool trips, new recipes, Beans, job hunting and all that crap, I promise. But due to popular demand I will also be sharing all the grody details of my pregnancy with you! So here's a recap of the last month and how this whole baby thing got started.

Since I have three years to wait until I can start school, Paul and I thought it would be a good time to try for a baby. I began to research fertility online and kept running into this statistic: "90% of all couples will try for a year to conceive. Only a very small percentage will conceive on their first try." So I stopped drinking caffeine, kept up with all my vitamins, watched my diet very closely and took careful note of when I was ovulating (yeah, you're gonna get all the nitty gritty details...well, not all of them!) And when the calendar had a big red heart on it we knew it was baby making time! Then whamo! It happened the first time we tried! Much to Paul's surprise I'm sure, as I've been filling his head with drastic (and probably made up) online statistics! But I think this baby was just waiting to appear and of course Paul's got some strong swimmers! He made me write that :)

So Paul leaves town for awhile for work and I'm playing with the puppy and noticing that every time she runs across my boobs it kills!! A few weeks later we go camping and I'm about three or four days late. Which isn't that uncommon for me especially during times of stress and I had just gone through that grueling interview for the science museum. As we're packing up our stuff on the last day of camping I told Paul that I was late and he was so excited! I told him it might just be a fluke and not to get his hopes up, but after seeing how happy he was I really wanted it to be more than a fluke! The next day I went to the doctors office and picked up a pregnancy test, cause they're free there! I wanted to take it right then! But knew I had to wait until the next day for the morning wee with all the hormones in it. I hardly slept all night, I was so excited and I just knew it would be positive! So I got up really early and peed on the stick and then burst into happy tears and woke up Paul with the good news.

I told my Mom and Pops the same day cause I was too fired up and had to share the good news with the people I knew would be most excited. But I had to wait a few weeks before I told anyone else. I couldn't wait the three months most people do. I hated making up stories about phantom cramps that kept me from parties. I hated lying to my friends at the bar "Oh yeah, this is totally a vodka tonic. NO!! You can't have a drink of it!" But we had to find the right time to tell the appropriate people here in England before we could broadcast it to everyone else, hence the absence from my blog. So the word is out now and I'm so relieved to be able to discuss everything with my friends.

If you have heard any of my stories about the bizarre things Paul's mom says to me then this will sound familiar. Paul told his mom over the phone a few weeks ago about the baby. I assumed the next time she saw me she might say congratulations or something similar. Oh no. The next time she came over to our house she said nothing about the baby except: "You'd better be careful that the dog doesn't get into the cot and eat the baby." WHAT!?!?!?!?!? Oh. My. Gawd. The woman is bat shit crazy and probably should not be allowed to wonder freely on the streets. In all seriousness though, I did get my feelings hurt. I wanted her to show me some sign of warmth or happiness. When I pictured what it would be like telling my family that I was pregnant I didn't really imagine warnings of possible baby consumption by Yorkshire Terriers. Now you have a little more insight into the twaddle that I have to deal with here.

But demented and unbalanced mother-in-laws aside I'm doing very well. The first 10 weeks were full of nausea and naps. Now I've dialed into my body a bit more and I know not to go more than four hours without eating or I turn into the pregnant bitch from hell. I try to lay down each afternoon for an hour or two just to recharge. My stomach is already big! Which really freaked me out until my Mom told me she was showing by three months as well. Just see for yourself!

Jeez! I've seen smaller stomachs on pot bellied pigs!

But the real star of the show of course is what's inside the belly! Here's the Doonlet (thanks Xea!)

Hi Baby!! For those of you who can't tell the brain from the butt: the baby's on it's right hand side, spine at the top, head on the right, hand in the middle, knee bend and leg under bum on the left hand side. Seeing the baby for the first time was indescribable. I can only call it amazing and the best day of my life so far. To me it already looks perfect and oh so cute! And thank god there's only one! All the bits are in the right places and my new due date is January 31st. But I have a feeling she/he will wait until February to make an appearance.

Other things have been happening. I did some work with Paul in Liverpool, a great city! So clean with a lovely cathedral. I worked all last week at the University of Birmingham, here in our city:

I was dressing the graduates in their caps, gowns and hoods for the ceremonies. It was hard work being on my feet all day, but I made some good money. The campus was beautiful!

We went camping in Wales recently and it was so much fun! The Welsh landscape is entirely different to England. More mountains, different plants, architecture and language. All the signs are in Welsh and English.

I found this beautiful working farm which also had camping pitches and horse trekking. It's called Bwlchgwyn Farm. Seriously. I have no idea how to pronounce it but it was lovely. And there was no one else there! Click on the pics to super size 'em!

Here's the view from our campsite

Maria and I went on a fantastic two hour horse trek down to the beach

What AM I doing with my ass here???

Safety first!

Here's some artsy-fartsy shots

Another view from our campsite

On our last day in Wales we took a trip to Portmeirion, an Italianate resort village, which is where The Prisoner was filmed back in the 60's. If you're not familiar with The Prisoner you suck, get off my blog! No, I kid. It was a great program and you should get it from Netflix. Unfortunately no doggies are allowed in Portmeirion, so these shots are noticeably Bean-free.